Spirit of Low Self Esteem

DeAnna Willman photo tim-mossholder@unsplash

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are all your works; my soul knows it very well. Ps 139:13-14

I am by no means an expert at understanding all there is to know about lying spirits, but I have observed that other than the spirit of fear, the next most prominent lying spirit with whom so many walk in agreement is the spirit of Low Self-Esteem. Unfortunately, this one opens wide the door in our house to so many more lying spirits, both “large” and “small.” This one is usually very subtle, as are many of the spirits it escorts into our house. Low self esteem is the lie that one has no value, no worth, is not loved, does not belong, has no purpose, and the world would be better off without that person. This lie is usually spoken to us through the words and actions of others- especially those we love or whose opinion we value. It usually enters an open door when one is very young.

Comparison is one such example. “how come you aren’t as ______ as your sister/brother/other person? You need to be more like ______. You are more difficult/high maintenance/needy/trouble (etc) than ______.” This is a sure way to tell someone they are inferior. It also guarantees sibling rivalry (discord/chaos within the home and relationships) and envy toward those with whom one is compared. Eventually the child will himself/herself start comparing him/herself to others and will ALWAYS find oneself lacking, or will look for reasons to feel superior to others. The latter leads to judgment and criticism of others in order to feel justified in oneself, justified in existing.

Other ways of speaking the lie is to show favoritism toward someone else. When a teacher or coach continually passes over certain students in favor of others, the message is “you are not as good as or not good enough.” When parents choose to spend more time with or speak kinder to or are more patient with one child while neglecting, speaking more harshly, and acting more impatient with another, they tell one child they are superior to the other, and the other is told he/she is inferior to the rest of the family. Both are lies. Both open the door to lying spirits and their whispered lies in the mind of a child.

Society also plays a part in telling lies of low self-esteem. Media and entertainment often portray a false reality about people which cannot be duplicated. It subtly tells people that they do not measure up: they must look, act, dress, or behave a certain way in order to be accepted. They will never be accepted for being their real self. Social media is a huge perpetrator of this lie! Wonder why we see so many who are quick to jump on the latest bandwagon or trend? They are told that to do so will make them acceptable. Otherwise they will never be loved, belong, or be accepted. Or so the lie goes. This is the very reason that vulnerable youth are easily initiated into gangs and cults and are easy prey for predators who would sexually violate them or trap them in the sex trades.

The pain of feeling no worth will many times lead one to believe the lie that they will feel better if they participate in porn, sexual encounters, drugs, gambling, eating disorders, and every other type of addiction known to mankind. Each of these further open doors to other lying spirits within the person. Addiction is the lie of idolatry. Something other than God will give you worth, give you relief, make you feel better about yourself. It can even lie to you that your chosen idol gives you control where you feel out of control. However, the reality is that each idol just brings more misery into one’s life. The idol of food leads to being overweight which can lead to anorexia or bulimia. Anorexia and bulimia are perverted ways of control. Gambling, shopping and drugs lead to money problems, health issues, sometimes jail time and criminal record, and even death. Often paranoia and other mental problems are a result of some of these idols.

The person with low self esteem will also walk in agreement with the lying spirit of fear. There is the fear of never being loved, of being left alone, of never belonging or having worth, of being rejected, of being ridiculed (shyness and social anxiety stem from these things), fear of mistakes and failure, fear of risk, fear of intimacy and vulnerability, feelings of being an imposter and the fear of being found out, and so much more.

Depression is a subtle spirit that moves into the house with low self esteem. It can simply start out as being sad and lonely, or with men an unexplained anger and moodiness. But it enters the door with the spirit of self-rejection and/or self-hatred. Self-rejection and self-hatred can manifest in one’s continual put down of self in words and actions, even if the person is doing it in a comedic way. Other forms of self-hatred come as anorexia, bulimia, being overweight, refusing to take care of self, or continually putting others before self to the detriment of self, cutting or inflicting other harm upon one’s body, and even in the form of people pleasing and what psychology calls “co-dependency.” This is the finding worth by being needed by others. People who are co-dependent tend to look for relationships where they will be needed, they provide something another person expects to get from others. They do for the other person what the other person chooses not to do for themselves. Classic example is the spouse or parent of an alcoholic or drug addict.

Depression manifests itself in so many ways. It is stealing the joy of the person who believes its lies. It is hindering the person’s growth and purpose. It kills any healthy fruit that might be had for the kingdom of God. It destroys the heart and soul of the one who believes it. It also destroys the body of that person. Whether from self-inflicted harm, our chosen behaviors, harm from actions of others, or simply the results of the continual negative and toxic thoughts, the enemy is destroying the body as well as the spirit.

Depressive thoughts cause an imbalance in hormones and neurotransmitters. While drugs may temporarily provide a bit of relief, they do not fix the problem. As long as the depressive thoughts continue, the brain and body will continue to respond with negative results. Thoughts of self-rejection lead the body to eventually attack itself. The brain is responding to the thoughts in the mind, releasing the chemicals and energy throughout the body that correspond with what the mind is telling the brain. If you hate yourself, your brain and body will turn on itself. It too will “hate” you.

The truth is that God loves you and has done so since before He created you. He was with you in the womb and had already approved of you. He created you specifically for specific purpose in His kingdom. He gave you freedom of choice and invited you to enter into intimate relationship with Him. He provided everything needed for you to enter into that relationship and to allow yourself to be vulnerable with Him. He has promised to never leave you nor forsake you. He has engraved you upon His hands (with nails), wants to write His law upon your heart so your heart beats with His, and He has called you His masterpiece. He is the perfect Father and has called you to be His child. He, through Yeshua, has also called you to be His bride. He has provided all you need, has gone before you, walks with you, and even carries you in His arms when it is needed. There is nothing about you that He does not already know. And nothing about you that will cause Him to reject you. There is so much more within the Scriptures, His word, that tells you the truth about who you are, why you are here, and how much Abba and His son love you.

This week ask YHWH to reveal to you where you have walked in agreement specifically with the lying spirit of low self-esteem. Repent for calling God’s creation (yourself) anything less than what He says you are. Cast out those lying spirits. Ask Abba for help in coming against not only low self esteem, but all the others that have entered your house with it. He will deliver you- even from addiction and mental health issues. Using the 6 step process, begin taking those thoughts (lies) captive and destroy them with the truth! He empowered you to be victorious! Use the Quantum Zeno Effect daily to tear down the strongholds that hinder your relationship with God, yourself, and with others. I am not saying it will be easy. It will take work and at least 63 days of mindful, repeated, consistent work. He has already won the war and declared you a conqueror. Believe and live that truth! As you do so, you will begin healing within the body and spirit, continuing ever closer to being whole and well in mind, body, and spirit. HalleluYah! How amazing will the Body of Messiah be when we are all operating in the truth of who we really are!!! So Be It!!!

Until next time…

“See what kind of love the Father has given us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know Him. Beloved you are God’s children now, and what you will be has not yet appeared; but we know that when {Yeshua} appears we shall be like him because we shall see him as he is.” 1 John 3:1-2.